Sunday, December 27, 2009

Sleeping with the Fishes

On the way home from Wal-Mart last night I looked I'm my rear view mirror and in a deep diabolical voice said, "Boys, tonight you will be sleeping with the fishes, whah,ha,ha,ha".

Yesterday we adopted two needy fish from the fish aquarium at Wal-Mart – 23 cents a piece.

Unfortunately for these new adoptees, I have a checkered history with fish, our last one got the dreaded fin rot disease and was flushed.  Too bad we never changed the water...  Fortunately for my fish-loving children "all drain lead to the ocean" (Source: Nemo).  If all drains lead to the ocean, what about the toilet?

So my experience with fish is that they die.  With this in mind, my 9 year old asked me how long they fish would live.  I gave him a range of 3 weeks to 3 years.  After a little research I found that my projection of life expectancy was way off.  Apparently goldfish can live for up to 40 years!!!!  It must be true if it’s in Wikipedia...

"Goldfish may grow to a maximum length of 23 inches (59 cm) and a maximum weight of 9.9 pounds (4.5 kg), although this is rare; most individual goldfish grow to under half this size. In optimal conditions, goldfish may live more than 40 years; however, most household goldfish generally only live six to eight years.

I never knew that goldfish were such a commitment.  Anyway.  I'm shooting for 6-9 months and we are good.

Back to Wal-Mart.  So we are walking through the store and I'm carrying the fish in the bag.  The kids have decided that I need to carry the new acquisitions because they were afraid that if the bag were to shake too much, they would die.  (Source, Nemo: Shaking Bag Scene in Dentist Office).  My lovely wife begins to worry about the fish getting too cold while walking from the store to the car.  Come on family, they are just fish…they were born to die.  Born to be eaten.  And I guess born to be decorative.

We make it home without killing the fish.  The next morning I check for belly-up fish (Another Nemo citation) and to my surprise, they are alive!  Now the boys are sleeping with the Fishes.

Sunday, December 20, 2009

Craig's Liveblogging of the Healthcare Debate in Congress

Hit F5 (Refresh) often to watch my liveblogging...

Friday, December 18, 2009

The Art of Stair Sledding

With the average temperatures below freezing, the kids are forced to do more inside.  This activity is stair sledding.  Have a blessed time with family next week.

ff

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Family Cat Lost for 103 Days – Found!

Our cat Daisy got out on September 3rd.  The kids were crushed and after a 20 day search, hundreds of flyers and even a blog (lostcat.info) we gave up.  Yesterday, 103 days later, a guy calls us and says he found our cat.

He was driving not far from our house and picked this frail white cat up while she was trying to get down a hole.  She was skin and bones and very weak.

A week later he saw a tattered piece of paper taped to a street sign, flipped it over and it was one of our flyers.  He called us up and we picked her up last night.  Wow…

IMG00747

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Our Household Vocabulary

Today Firstborn sat down and wrote a list of everything he and the other kids have named or created.  This list of over 300 items contains names of stuffed animals, games created, sayings, slogans and made-up characters in stories. 

If you want to know the meaning of something in particular, leave a comment and I’ll ask the kids to define it for you….

Kids are cool…

Abearican
Abearican English
Agent Walree
Air Simmie
Allroad Suggestion
Amitie
Andersca
Animal Research
Apple-Picking Place
Arctica, Grant
Arctica, Private Arctica
Areqlaemy
Aw-duh-bor-ay
Aw-tuh-poh
Baaboo Baby
Babezilla
Baby McRay
Babytropolis
Bandaiditisphobia
Basement
Basement Wastelands
Bathesda
Bean-Eyed Monster
Bearemy's
B's Christmas Store
B's Learning Website
B's Library
B’s Room
Benny Usborne
Betabet Theory
Bighind Bird
Billy Bob Joe
Billy Bob Joe: Escape from Princess Island
Billy Bob's Anger Management
Bleachy Socks
Blue Platypus
Boboflamicphobia
Bookworm Library
Bootheads
Brentenstein
Brick City
Broth
Build-A, Charcoal Grill
Build-A, Coconut Bikine
Build-A-Bear Island
Burger Freak
Burrito Birthday Cake
Buttox Plant
Camper the Camp
Cardboard House
Celery Pun
Cent
Central Terrier Territories
Cheesybiz
Chip
Christmas Tree Decoration Industry
Cliffun
Congravital Theory
Cousin Bread
Cremé
Croaka Lisa
Crouton
Daddite
Daisy
Dim Ditty
District of Martin
Doesnthaveahipitis
Dogzilla
Domastash
Dory
Düplex
Eddie Spitgar
Eddie Spitgar's Diary
E's Website
E’s Room
Emphasizo Script
Escapefromcamperoo Attempt
Evil Gross Gang of Singers
Eyebrows Real Estate Agency
Fatalbloodlossitis
Fatman
Federal Landing Area Fetch! With Puff Puffman
Fire Simmie
Flatfoot
Flower Potion
Foongi
Frizzy
Furry, Bella Bunny
Furry, Berry Dog
Furry, Biscuit Sngravey
Furry, Brentina Beanbum
Furry, Cheeky Pengy
Furry, Flipper Hoppz
Furry, Fluffy Wuffy
Furry, Frisky Poogums
Furry, Fudge Coco
Furry, Ginger Bread
Furry, Ginger Bread, Jr.
Furry, Hipper Eyebrows
Furry, Leo Pard
Furry, Luna Moon
Furry, Mama Petey
Furry, Milo Fuzzums
Furry, Mister Diggers



Munko
Furry, Moony Lune
Furry, Ribbitz Hoppz
Furry, Rocky Dino
Furry, Ryan Rhino
Furry, Shadow Sparky
Furry, Skippy Jonjones
Furry, Smokey Bear
Furry, Snowflake Pood
Furry, Sparky Shadow
Furry, Spotkinz Leopard
Furry, Squeakers Mouse
Furry, Sweety Petey
Furry, Tabbers Tabb
Furry, Tiny Rexy Chico
Furry, Tiny Tweezy Chico
Furry, Tisky Poogums
Furry, Turdsley Frankly
Furry, Tweety Dino
Furry, Uni Buni
Furry, Unknowny Harrison
Furry Aliens
Furry Aliens II
Garagia
Garthur
Girland
Gora the Explorer
Gramp-puh-pa
Grampa Joe
Gran-puh-pa
Great Babe
Great Cat I
Great Cat II
Great Cat III
Great Dog I
Great Dog II
Great Dog III
Great Fish I
Great Wall of Pudgles
Great Worm I
Green Platypus
Greeting of the Friends
Greg the Great
Gub
Gumby’s Pizza
Hamanium Bomb
Happy Snake
Horseshoe Hill
Horseshoe Homeschool
Horseshoe of Life
Huglantic Theory
Ice
Infinity
Infinity, Googolplex, and Pi
Intercontinental Steppes
It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Sam Day
Jimmy John
Jonestownsvillesburg
Kid's Kitchen
Knoitoll
Landing
Larry Spinkelton
Lascivania
Lava Monster
Lava Squid
Lavatopia
Legotown
Lemon Potion
Let’s Take a Gander at Mr. Diggers’ Shadow Festival
Lila
Little Ugly Gas Station Town
Loafers
Lucy
Macaroni
Martinian Cloaf
Massiveguy Theory
Mean-Faced Owl
Midfloor
Mini Meat Crunchers 
Minicity

Moldy Socks
Moldy Socks and the Three Platypuses
Mommite
Moth
Mr. Martin
Mr. Voliver
Mrs. Beanstalk
Mrs. Beanstalk's Horseshoe of Life
My Retarded Wedding
Netta
New Kinz
New Kitty Territories
Nonfittable Cardboard House
Not-So-Pretty Pony
Nut
Old Fat Stupid Ugly Grumpy Wrinkly Kid
Oodlepus
Oodles Gang

Oodlesaurus
Oodworm
Orange Potion
Owen
PB&J Depot
Paperzona Attempt
Parentopia
Pee Wee Preschool
Penist
Persian Poodle
Pete Piccolo Birdbingbard
Pigaroni
Pilah
Pink Platypus
Pink Underwear Pun
Poh Polka-Dotta Polka-Dotta Polka-Dotta Doo
Pops
Power Baby
Power Boy
Pretty Polly Promise
Prime Pudgles
Pudgles
Raggersons, Ratty Rag
Ratta
Rice
Ripaphobia
Roach Country
Roboflamicphobia
Robots
Rock Factory
Rocket McRay
Rombox
S&B Show
Samfé 
Sammy McRay
Samnett
S''s Book Factory
S’s Postcard-Perfect Christmas Village
S’s Room
Sanguage
Sassy Socks
Sea Simmie
Shopville
Silent Night Version 2.0
Sis
Small Woman
Sock Skating
Sophie
Southern Terrier Territories
Southern Topfloor
Spectrum Pen
Spikieitis
Squashington, D.C.
Squeezersons, Larry Squash
Squishy
Stick Tree
Stiffie
Stinky Potion
Stone City
Stuff-a-thon
Stuffie
Stuffie Council
Stuffie Olympics
Stuffsonian Institution
Stufftropolis
Stufftropolis Hospital
Stufftropolis Tri-Room Area
Stufftropolis University
Sugar Blobs
Tam-poh
Terrier Territories
The Potatoe That Came to School
The Roachstain Roaches
Tiger, Ti Tige
Tiger, Velvet Horse
Tinosaurs
Topfloor
Topfloor Manifest
Tornado Maker
Trade-A-Toy
Turd Girl
Two Rotten Cookies
Two Tubbies
Uggo
Uhpoh-Uhtay-Uhtoh
Uncle Joe
Under the Trees
United Rooms of the Stuffie Union
United Rooms of the Stuffie Union Headquarters
Vegetaria
Venessa
Venessa City
Vitamin Man
Warsh
Western Terrier Territories
Where in the World Do You Think Wigglemeir Could Possibly Be?
Wormy
Wudgles
Zee Za
Zippermobile

     

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

SERMON: Created for His Glory

image I had the opportunity to speak at Lafayette Church of Christ in West St. Louis County last month.  I discuss how awesome God is and how cool he thinks His creation is, especially you…

Love to hear what you think.  I rarely get a chance to preach so -- it’s amateur hour…

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Christmas Records

IMG_4828

When Pinkerbelle first saw the record player she thought it would slide in a big slot in front.  She said, “wow, those are big DVDs”.

My first born thought it was supposed to have a big horn on top so we could hear them.

During one of my wife’s many trips to the thrift store, she picked up a record player.  We have a collection of Christmas music on records and now we can listen to them.  It’s pretty cool.

IMG_4829

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

US Government Sues Navy Seals for Giving Terrorist a Fat Lip

Are we living in some kind of weird parallel universe?  A place where “up” is “down”, “good” is “bad”, “right” is “left” and “heroes” are “villains”.  A bizzaro world?

In March 2004, four U.S. citizens (contracted by the US government to deliver food to caterers in Iraq) were ambushed by terrorists lead by Ahmed Hashim Abed.  The Americans were dragged from their cars and beaten to death.  Their bodies were set on fire and hung off a bridge.  This event triggered the first Battle of Fallujah.

Ahmed was tracked down and caught by four Navy Seals this September.  Terrorist Ahmed sustained a fat lip and was punched in the stomach.

Our government rewarded these heroes with a law suit.  This week the Navy Seals will have to face a court-martial for protecting our interests by delivering a fat-lip and a fist to the stomach of a terrorist.

Could someone explain to me why we are wasting time, energy and money worrying about the comfort of terrorists.  They are the enemy!  They want us dead!

Come on people, we can at least let our soldiers punch the enemy, rough them up a little.  Instead we focus on giving them our constitutional right.  The exact opposite thing you would expect a country at war to do. 

I guess if it can work for George on Seinfeld, maybe it will work for the U.S. too…

See foxnews.com or cbs for more about this story.

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